get back stare , open

[ruby]

dear person,

wattup homie?

much care,
r.m.

[junipertwo]

dearest r.m.,

are you serious? i thought that mode of speaking was outlawed in the nineties. in any case dear heart, this homie's day has been rather average, though brightened somewhat by this poor owl's arrival (i'd best inform you it did fly into a window, poor beast; i nursed it back to consciousness).

with love, this person.

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[ruby]

dear person,

oh... that's just dandy. i'm happy i could brighten your day in such a nice way, excuse the owl... have you heard anything interesting lately? i've been in my own personal shell lately and i've missed a lot not just in general news but the gossip as well, i'd appreciate some help here

much care,
r.m.

[junipertwo]

dearest r.m.,

hmm, interesting, interesting... nothing of even remote interest passes through these walls on a daily basis. no murder, rape, infidelity, death, robbery, snatchings, identity theft (well, actually ... nevermind) or anything else fun. i could regale you with inane tales of the mundane personalities who coexist here but i would bore myself to sleep and this owl would never get sent. i could only really tell you with any certainty (and any actual interest) about the lives of those in my house and dormitory, but then i would be breaking a code of blood brotherhood. but where have you been to be missing out on all these things? i thought i held the crown for most apathetic to the castle's general happenings, but you take the cake, seemingly.

with love, this person.

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[ruby]

dear person,

wow i don't think that was long enough, so basically you know nothing except for the secrets of your friends and house mates and you don't want to tell them to me? secrets should be told, that's the fun of them! and i've just had my nose in books lately because i have a tendency to get behind in my classes much too easily. but i'm not usually so apathetic, i like knowing things about whats happening around me, i especially like knowing secrets...

much care,
r.m.

[junipertwo]

dearest r.m.,

my sincerest apologies that my letter was not to your evidently high and moralistic standards. tattletales and gossips are not high on my list of worthy individuals. if you liked to know of things that happen around you, you might open your eyes and find something that might entertain your clearly shallow mind. however even despite this horrendous scrawl you may call handwriting i may be willing to give you another chance, provided you do not intend to infer any further that i might possibly besmirch my honour and that of those around me by spreading their secrets thin. do i make myself clear?

with love, this person.

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[ruby]

dear person,

hmm... sadly with me 'tattling' is a bit of a permanent disease. and i'd like to reject your accusation that i'm shallow - i'm quite the opposite... well usually. on a good day at least... and perhaps i don't want a 'second chance' with you, since i don't take easily to those who belittle me.

much care,
r.m.

[junipertwo]

dearest r.m.,

well you may take your permanent disease and keep it far from my person. i have no desire to become infected. and i suppose everyone can be shallow, especially on a bad day. if you won't have your second chance then that is of no concern to me. i give very little care as to what people think of me. though may i just say, i could be far more belittling if i found the desire to be. it seems your entire personality is at odds with my opinion of a good person. and a shallow, gossipy, scrawling mess such as yourself leaves the door wide open for insults. my advice: modify your behaviour and your handwriting.

with love, this person.

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[ruby]

dear person,

tell me something, do you enjoy acting like a pretentious snob or is that just how you were born? my money is on a mixture of both.

not much care,
r.m.